Relationship

Relate: to have a connection. This is the root of relationship: to have some sort of connection. Maybe our relationship is through work - the connection being a common goal. Perhaps our relationship is through activism - the connection being outrage and/or passion regarding a certain circumstance. Maybe we're friends - friends share many different levels of intimacy. Some of my friends would never crawl into bed to console me, but Myles would/has. Last night I heard a therapist talk about healing people who live in war zones and experience trauma on an ongoing basis. Music to my ears was when he said two extremely profound things: healing happens through relationship; and secondly, the best possible thing we can do for people in crisis is to live among them normally. To live normally when all about is chaos. What a gift!!! To share a cup of tea with the homeless ladies as if we're not surrounded by crack and needles and predators. My life includes relationships of many different kinds including friends, kids, my parents, my co-workers, homeless folks, mentally ill folks, activists of every nature, academics who love the sound of their own voices. Each of these relationships contribute to my wholeness. I share parts of me with each of them, all of me with none of them.
My life is changed because I relate to you. I am enhanced by you even if our encounter was brief.
Relationships that go beyond the casual require time and commitment. I cannot get to know you through a phone. I cannot share intimacy through e-mail. Maybe others can, I cannot. I am tactile, I require all my senses to be involved. When I'm funny I want to see you laugh. When I cry I want to see the compassion reflected. When you share new knowledge with me, I want you to see the lights in my eyes. Relationship that goes beyond the mundane takes sacrifice. It means adjusting the flow of your life and my life in order to make time and space for one another. When it really matters, we do that.
There are people who say they want a relationship and yet no sacrfice is made. No space opened up to allow for more. One of my favorite sayings, "What you do speaks so loudly I can't hear what you're saying." My translation: stop talking and start doing. We need one another as humans. Perhaps there is no god, no supreme being out there when we cry for help. What there is for sure is human energy mixing with nature energy and when we have passion, compassion, and love mixing with the powers of the earth, there must be nothing we can't accomplish.
Let's relate to one another in ways that matter and make sense.